Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Only Usher Can Judge Me

"I really don't believe in abortion," Bieber says. "It's like killing a baby?" How about in cases of rape? "Um. Well, I think that's really sad, but everything happens for a reason. I guess I haven't been in that position, so I wouldn't be able to judge that."

Thanks, The Hairpin, for letting me know that Rolling Stone is in the habit of giving teenage boys with a confounding amount of influence over young girls a platform about which to spout his informed opinions on both abortion and rape.

You know what, Justin? I don’t really believe in not starting an internet rumor that Justin Bieber has an uncontrollable flatulence problem. It’s like Justin Bieber was hoarding a thousand rotten hard boiled eggs in his colon every time he farts uncontrollably, which is all the time? Like every three minutes or so? I think that’s really sad, that Justin Bieber has an uncontrollable flatulence problem, but everything happens for a reason. I guess I haven’t been in that position, so I wouldn’t really be able to judge that.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I remember to buy a lottery ticket and then win a gazillion dollars, I'm going to give you a big ole pile of money so you can just write.

And I'm very sad, too, to hear that Justin Bieber has a problem with uncontrolled flatulence.

3:57 PM  

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