Thursday, August 04, 2005

Ye Old Mill

I'm not writing about this to make light of it, but I'm fascinated by this story of a seven-year-old who died on Ye Old Mill at Playland amusement park. Eerie just barely begins to describe a mother putting a kindergartener on dark water ride by himself and finding he didn't come back out the other end.

Creepier still is the ride itself, which I remember vividly from an eighth grade field trip. Mildred E. Strang Middle School rewarded all of its graduating students for three years of controlled chaos completed by bussing them down to Playland for one blissful, sunburned May day. Playland was built in the 1920s and looks much the same as it did then. The park's claim to fame was that the fortuneteller scenes from the movie Big were filmed there, a movie that remains only on the tips of those tongues accustomed to justifying a trip to such a rinky-dink destination. Instead of rides with more loops than a box of Cheerios, the most daring attraction at Playland is the tame wooden Dragon Coaster which sheds toothpicks from its most rickety joints.

One of the other original rides still operating is Ye Old Mill, which was creepy in that no one seemed to know why the ride existed at all. It was neither a tunnel of love nor a haunted house. Riders boarded boats propelled on a conveyer belt through a two foot river and entered a dark tunnel decorated with mannequins, terrifying only because they weren't meant to be. The ride was slow, there were no dips or splashes, and you emerged from the other end of the tunnel slightly unsettled and three ride tickets poorer.

It's the little details of the story that creep me out. It's broadly and obviously tragic that a kid died at the amusement park, but why was he on the ride alone? How did he manage to get under a boat, when there's not enough room for a kid between the boat and the edges of the channel? The boats are only a couple feet apart, so what about all the other people on the ride? Why was there no film in the video camera that records the ride's interior? I know for a fact that there used to be, and I suspect that was how Kai and a cute kid named Stefan were caught spitting in the water during their eighth grade trip and got ye old booted off Ye Old Mill.

To change subjects:

I have (another) interview today, and I guess you could say I'm nervous for it. More than anything, though, I'm just tired of going on interviews. Between my summer blahs, my employment blues, and the ninety-plus degrees outside, it's a smidge difficult to pile on the interview appropriate layers and hustle uptown with an ever sweatier folder of resumes in hand.
This is not to say I'm not excited about the position I'm looking at. From what I can gather it would be so "up my alley" I might get pregnant, and I would gladly sweat in a sweater and button-down and incredibly dowdy brown pleated skirt for a shot at landing it. It's a different kind of a gig, but one that I think might be really interesting. This new job is the delightful combination of being a little off the figurative beaten path and being a literal hell of a lot closer to Grand Central than my current position. I could shave an hour off my commute time every day, which in and of itself was worth applying.

We'll see, though, we'll see. The number of things that can silently irritate an interviewer into passing me (you, anyone) up is terrifying. My HR rep might violently hate visible, kind of emo hand tattoos, or people who wear glasses, or people who forgot to put earrings in only one set of earholes this morning. My interviewer might hate the fact that I say "eether" instead of "eyether."

I might hate the fact that she's a bitch, but that's neither here nor there.

I suppose it works in the opposite direction as well. Maybe we will both have FeriaTM French Roast hair. Maybe my interviewer will have a soft spot for in pointy flats with Converse All-Stars obviously shoved in her bag.

Maybe he'll be a superhot dude and I can finally, finally begin sleeping my way to the top.


Blogger Kunaxa said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:44 PM  
Blogger Kunaxa said...

I might hate the fact that she's a bitch, but that's neither here nor there.

Is that "neether" or "neyether" ?


1:46 PM  
Anonymous stupidboy said...

Good luck with the interview. I think I went to somewhere similar to Playland but slightly crappier. It was called Clara Lara Funpark. It basically involved falling in dirty water and getting rope burn.

6:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brandon Flowers got married over the weekend :(

11:43 AM  
Blogger What'sHerFace said...

I heard that. Well, I wish my good friend Brandon the best--I hope he and his new wife have lots of babies, and put them in tiny little pink blazers.

12:11 PM  
Anonymous brad said...

brandon flowers doesn't know that thrift stores don't sell magazines.

3:57 PM  

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